less than this » poetry

Slow and Steady

Teel — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 08:30:15 +0000

I am the tortoise
I will not speed past you
I will not pass you at all
             on your best day.
            but I’ll do today
         what I did yesterday
      and tomorrow, again:
Work steadily
     carefully
     methodically
     consistently
     without interruption
     until the day is done
              and on most days
You will find you have fallen behind
                I have come out ahead.
              (without coming out of my shell)

deep penicillin

Teel — Tue, 10 Oct 2006 16:43:46 +0000

deep penicillin -
I am disease and diseased -
my thoughts are poison

cruel words

Teel — Mon, 09 Oct 2006 22:00:12 +0000

the dif’rence between
suicide and homicide
is in your cruel words

Static, acid, inside

Teel — Thu, 07 Sep 2006 01:43:41 +0000

I have been disintegrating.
  Gradually,
       internally,
            losing my signal
within the noise.

This world destroys me.
  I drink it in,
       refreshed,
           the acidic coldness
swallows me entirely.

admissions

Teel — Wed, 02 Aug 2006 05:25:38 +0000

If you could be honest with me
would you admit

   you want me
              to break
    everything
              apart,

   you want
           me
         no
           matter
       what?

       would you admit
             you don’t care about your
       better
             judgement
   as much as
             you care about
                       love?

       would you admit love?
   you could be honest
   you could be
                       with me

I need hugs.

Teel — Wed, 29 Mar 2006 21:12:04 +0000

I need hugs. Contact;
reassuring, physical.
You, all around me.

One has never been enough.
I’m incomplete without you.

i used to be ahead, now i’m behind and i can’t keep up

Teel — Wed, 10 Aug 2005 07:50:41 +0000

new breath, black eyes, tiny life,
     (
      best friend
one step
      removed by wife
two steps
      removed by son
infinitely
      separated by a gulf I cannot cross
alone)
a beautiful thing, now peaceful.
Both of us unable to survive
     without
     human touch,
     community,
     love
only I know how to fake it,
so my
slow death
     (sped a step by his arrival)
goes unnoticed
     (as birth is announced broadly)
I am become my own failure:
alone-
      separated from the community
     -because I am
alone.
my dying breath, my black tears, my tiny life.

i’m not too tired to feel this

Teel — Wed, 27 Jul 2005 08:19:24 +0000

failure is like
   a flavour
   of ice cream
it’s always just intense enough
     so you can taste it
        even as it numbs

… away.

Teel — Sat, 11 Jun 2005 07:56:53 +0000

Sometimes the diff’rence
between round-trip and one-way
is the strength to stay …

and then what?

Teel — Wed, 02 Mar 2005 17:56:05 +0000

and then what?
suddenly simple?

   everything works out?
that … seems unlikely.

           seems untrue.
but maybe “friends”

  or maybe nothing

               ever

               again
only one has ever

               disappeared

completely

               gone;

can she too              ?
I wish someone would

   tell me

   what it is

   I’m supposed to have done

                              wrong.
or how to do

            right

            right now.
and then what?

beyond the fold

Teel — Tue, 01 Feb 2005 08:59:49 +0000

I find myself walking away

and I’m not looking back

and I’m not in any pain

and I’m not tired at all

and I’m not shivering

and I’m not anxious.

I find myself walking away,

and I find myself smiling.

I will see you again.

“chick flicks” -OR- Projected Bliss

Teel — Sat, 10 Apr 2004 08:36:40 +0000

One more romantic movie
    one more cliche
A smile, a laugh, and a kiss
    I wish were mine
Heart thumping, emotions running,
    I am involved.
In ninety minutes romance forms,
    is lost, refound,
the fantasy – true love – and I -
    - I feel it all.
And if I had my own romance
    would I need this?
A dose of love in lonliness;
    light in the dark

Made you look!

Teel — Sun, 13 Jul 2003 06:48:08 +0000

Ha! I made today
look like a weekday, rather
than a dull weekend.

No one ever posts; I guess
they’re all out enjoying life.

sick & TIRED

Teel — Sat, 12 Jul 2003 02:29:40 +0000

Today, one thing. Tomorrow,
    something else.
I can’t take all this
    indeciciveness.
Restless, I find myself
    cracking, crumbling.
Each day I come closer to being
    killed by this mess.
Destroyed by this stress.

Imagined Boundaries

Teel — Sat, 15 Feb 2003 11:01:55 +0000

Where my bed is not.
Where it used to be. I sleep.
As though it remained.

This space; imagined bound’ries,
I stay within. My sleep’s home.